My third option, in an attempt to try and have a baby with this blocked Tube, is through a course of Clomifene - a fertility drug. In some weird way, in my head, this feels like the more "natural" option... Because there is no surgery, not injections, no removal of eggs etc, I can almost convince myself that taking the Fertility Drugs is as close to conceiving natural as I could possibly hope.
The tablets are to be taken between days 2-6 of my cycle and increase the production of eggs in my ovaries each month, encouraging more than one egg at a time to be released.
As this is a lot less precise, it is advised, according to the handout I received, to buy one of those ovulation kits, so Hubby and I can ensure we are hitting the right time (I am so glad I have more than one relative who works for Boots!! Love their discount benefit!!). The other thing the consultant advises is for us to have intercourse every other day after each cycle of the Clomifene, for 5-6 days, just to make sure! This can be quite demanding, I would imagine, because regardless of how ill / tired / annoyed / upset etc... either of us are. I'm hoping Hubby will begin to understand the enormity of the situation, but I'm fearful about out times of intimacy becoming a chore. I've heard stories about women who have become mechanical about making sure they have intercourse when they ovulate... I don't want to become like that.
The hardest thing for me about this, would be regularly taking the tablets - even just for the five days. I'm so rubbish at routine. When Hubby and I first married I went on the contraceptive patch, to avoid the daily routine of taking the pill, because I have forgotten to take them in the past (when I was younger, I was prescribed the pill for the severe cramps I had during my period).
The other thing to take into consideration are the side effects, the biggest one being the increased risk of having a multiple birth; but I think this seems a better risk than the increased risk of an ectopic pregnancy, which faces me with the option 2. I know there are added complications for women who are expecting more than one baby, including higher risk of miscarriage, but the way I see it is that there are risks involved in every decision.
Other side effects include hot flushes, breast discomfort, skin rashes, tummy bloating (I get that anyway!), nausea, dizziness, and blurred vision - this last one is so severe, I would have to stop the treatment immediately.
There is also a slight risk of developing Ovarian Hyperstimulation Sydrome, where the ovaries are stimulated too much, producing excess fluid which can leak into the body, and accumulate around some of the vital organs around the body. This can only be treated by hospitalisation.
Although not physically demanding, in the same was as the laparascopic surgery would be, there are still demands on the body in the regular checks, blood tests, etc which would need to be carried out. But it is also emotionally demanding, and can be quite discouraging, month-after-month. Unlike previous months, there is the added pressure because of taking Clomifene, there is an increased expectation each month that I will be pregnant.
When I asked the consultant about the rate of success for the fertility drugs, he wasn't really able to answer, as he said there are too many factors surrounding the condition of the woman and the condition of her her tubes, etc, the age of the woman, the condition and quality of the sperm, and so many other factors, that he was unable to give me a rate of success for using the drug alone, as a fertility treatment. researching online, I can understand why he wasn't able to give me a figure, as the rates offered range between 30% - 60% of women who take Clomifene end up having a baby.
The other downside is that the Consultant can only give a six month course of Clomifene. If I don't become pregnant after six months, then the treatment stops.
In some of the stuff I have read, there is no mention of it being used as a successful way to help a woman with blocked tubes to conceive. The problem is not so much that I am not ovulating, the problem is more to do with the egg successfully travelling down my Fallopian Tube each month to meet Hubby's swimmers. I'm not sure how this would work on the "off" month - when the Tube which is blocked is supposed to release the eggs - whether Clomifene stimulates the healthy side each month anyway. Need to check that out.
I did try to speak to my Consultant, to find out if I were to take option 3, whether I can go back to option 2 if the Fertility Drugs don't work, or whether the drugs should be the final step. For myself, I would rater have the surgery as a back-up option, purely because of the physical trauma of surgery, and try taking the Fertility Drugs first.
So now I have to wait for the Consultant to come back to me after the Christmas break. How he answers my question will determine how I work out what my next step will be. Till then... more waiting!
So I have a decision to make about what my next step with be in treating the blocked tube as Hubby and I try to conceive. The first option thrown at us by the Consultant, was to pay for our own courses of IVF treatment, as I was not eligible (Hubby has a son already - apparently that's supposed to make up for my inability to conceive and I should be thankful for another woman's child in my life!).
In previous postings, I have mentioned how I would not go down the road of having IVF treatment. This was a decision I came to after researching what happens during a course of IVF, and I felt that morally (and probably emotionally too, if I am honest!), I couldn't deal with it.
I didn't like the idea of multiple embryos (AKA babies) being created and then being discarded or killed when they aren't used. For me, I have always held the belief that a life starts from the moment we are conceived... from Scriptures such as, Psalm 139: 13-16: "For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made... My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be." and Isaiah 44:24: "Thus says the LORD, your Redeemer, And He who formed you from the womb: “I am the LORD, who makes all things, Who stretches out the heavens all alone, Who spreads abroad the earth by Myself" (Also the same statement is made in verse 2 of the same chapter), or Jeremiah 1:5: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”
For me, life is life from conception, not from birth, or from a particular point in the developmental process (for some people, babies aren't considered "human" until they show rational thought!). Which is why I didn't think I could handle the process of going through the IVF course. When I learnt that they take a number of eggs and sperm and put them together to fertilise, thus "creating" life multiple times, but only one, two or at most, three are replaced back in the mother's womb, the rest are either frozen or rejected, I struggled to come to terms with balancing the creation of life with the destruction of that same life.
Now some may think that it doesn't matter because the baby has been fertilised rather than conceived. But for me, the moment the cells start dividing - the organism is living, creation is occurring.
It became an easier decision to live with, when Hubby and I found out we would not be eligible for NHS treatment of IVF anyway, because of Hubby's son. I think had I not reached the place within my own heart of what I would do in the possibility of infertility, the news from the Consultant a couple of weeks ago would have been devastating. Instead, I have a peace about this particular decision about what to do next.
Earlier this week, there was an article in the Daily Mail on Wednesday 2nd January, 2013, which discusses in more detail the process of IVF, called "1.7 million embryos created for IVF have been thrown away, and just 7 per cent lead to pregnancy". This is not me being political - I just found the article quite informative, and helped me to explain in more detail, why I made the decision I have.
If you are in the process of IVF, or are considering IVF, please don't think I am trying to condemn you. This is just a blog about my Journey For Bubba... each of us may be on a similar road, but our Journey's for our Bubba's will be different.
I pray the Lord's leading a direction for each of us will help us all with the decisions we have to make.
