I realised today that the Journey for Bubba I am doesn't just affect me. Nor does it only affect Hubby. My mum sent me a simple text and I saw, for the first time since I started walking this path, how it is affecting my mum too.
"I've just seen the most perfect outfit for your babies. The Lord should quit tarrying!"
As the only girl in a family of boys (there are even more boys than girls among the children of the next generation!), I see how my mum is also holding onto the hope that one day, her only daughter will have a baby. Being the mother of a daughter who is pregnant and about to give birth has a different feel to it than being the mother of the son whose wife is having children. There is a different dynamic to experiencing the pregnancy of a daughter, than of a son, purely because a mother knows what her daughter is going through. I've read stories from women who became closer to their mothers after childbirth, because they had a shared experience between them... mother and daughter against the rest of the world.
There is also the element that when a woman is poorly, or she needs something, more often than not she is more likely to go to her mother than her mother-in-law.
Far from feeling pressured by the text, far from feeling, "Oh no I can't produce a Grandchild from my parents". far from feeling they are on my case to give them another Grandchild, as I know some women do, I felt a sense of relief and understanding, that even though my parents are so far away from me, they - my mum in particular - are with me in this testing season. She is fighting her own struggle, on my behalf - as well as her own. They say that when you become a mum, you never stop being a mum, even when your own children become parents themselves... This is obviously so true in my mum's case. She feels my pain, because she has her own pain. She has a walked a similar path in her own past, so she understands better than most how I am feeling.
Father God, I lift up my mum to you - and other mums like her - who watches me struggle on this Journey for Bubba. She has her own desires to be a Grandma to our Bubba, and I now realise how she struggles, just like me, when she goes to the shops and sees the cute baby stuff. Lord, I thank You for the faithful prayers of my mum, on our behalf, and I pray that our prayers would join together in agreement, because You said, "if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven" (Matthew 18:19). Father, I thank You because she has listened to me so many times on the phone, and her heart must have broken when mine was breaking, she must have cried silent tears as I sobbed out loud, she must have longed to take me in her arms, just as I long to hold Bubba in mine. Father, thank You for placing me under her care - and the care of my father. I ask You would grant her wisdom and uphold her, as she supports Hubby and I through our Journey, and as she walks her own path beside us. In Jesus name.
- Bubba's Hopeful Mumma
- Hi. Welcome to my "taboo" blog. My name is Steph, and when I first started this, I was still in my thirties. In 2017, I switch decades! I am a Christian, so underlying everything I do and say is the Word of God, and the foundational truths I have learnt over the years. This doesn't mean I'm perfect - I am human. It just means I recognise I need God's help to live this life and try to live out His way, as best I can. So that's me in a nutshell. Thanks for taking the time to read through my blog, I hope you draw strength, hope or encouragement from what you read.